Every man has a story to tell when it comes to teaching his spouse driving. That's precisely when the whole marriage undergoes the extreme test of patience!
Don't know why women don't get it when it comes to watching rear view mirror, blind spot, side view mirror, all while maintaining speed and then change lane :-)
My wife's driving lessons can be published in volumes - like that lagging yet interesting "Kill Bill" movie.
She started off taking lessons in late 2005. Maintaining the car in the same lane was the first challenge. She swings from one side to other side of the road and would still claim that she is in the same lane. After a month of shouting and screaming, I arranged a mallu tutor for giving her lessons. He came one day and at the end of the class he said "continue practicing with husband. call me once you are ready for the dmv test.". I think he meant to say "sorry, I have a family to take care of. You can put your husband at risk and don't ever call me".
Luckily (for me) she had a major distraction to handle when she was expecting Kunju in 2006.
The saga restarted on late 2006 again. This time we called a vietnamese guy. I had high expectation on him. He gave two classes and said "continue practicing with husband. call me once you are ready for the dmv test."!! I was shocked, as far as I knew, he didn't have a family. But sometimes people care for themselves too :-(
Meanwhile her DMV learners license expired twice and she took written re-tests in flying colors (practice.. practice.. practice!). The last time when she went there, the DMV official shook her hand for visiting maximum times in an year (in my exaggerated version I tell people that DMV director came out of office to welcome her :-) )
Year 2007 mostly went with the same vietnamese guy coming only when he is so desperate for money. We moved apartments thrice and our 'chinky' guy sometimes was shocked to see us at new place (we give only address for the student, not the name. So he would know who he is going to teach only when he reaches). One time I asked him "is she a good driver now?" and he said "no, she is a dangerous driver".
Priya's driving lessons turned from an urban joke to more of folklore standard. Mallu people around started using this as a saying - like "kuttiyar kollathu poya polae" or "priya driving class edukum polae" etc..
Year 2008 I decided to change the tutor. Anyways, the vietnamese guy didn't like Ho Chi Minh.
We went for the hard working central travancore christian family run institute. After the first class the guy said "let us finish this as soon as possible". I said in mind "or she will finish you as soon as possible".
However, that proved one more time that there is nothing that can beat the perseverance of central tranvancore christians. It came in the form of a license with a smiling face :-)
PS: This is reviewed and blessed by my better half. She has been cooking beef fry for her beloved, while he was writing crap :-)
Sunday, May 31, 2009
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
The inertia to leave United States...
The following fact has puzzled me always...
Once you are in United States it takes a great amount of 'will' to go back to India.
You agree or not, that's the truth for most people.
I have been based in California for past 4 years. When we came here in 2005, I used to tell people that I want to go back to India and will be doing it in short term. It's been 4 years and I am still saying the same thing.
How much is 'short term'? few months? couple of years? A deeper thought would reveal that 'short term' is a just 'big excuse' to stick on to US without feeling the guilt of staying away from home land or family. Bitter, but truth.
Now let us call this inertia. What is causing this inertia? Few facts could be -
a. Money - needs no explanation. The more we get, the more we want. The more we make, the more we invest. It's a loop.
b. Comfort - A less tiring life is another popular justification I have heard around. That's true. Most people stay close to work. "Close" is say ~10 miles. A 10 or 15 minutes of drive would let you reach home. Compare it against the hours of travel you need to do from Electronic city to Koramangala! (I have done it tons of times, so I know!).
c. Better place for bringing up Kids - Yup, another truth. (or rather, my wife says so..)
If you agree, add to my list. If you don't, feel free to comment with cons -
I welcome this wholeheartedly. Because I am looking for a reason here.. a reason to break the inertia.
Once you are in United States it takes a great amount of 'will' to go back to India.
You agree or not, that's the truth for most people.
I have been based in California for past 4 years. When we came here in 2005, I used to tell people that I want to go back to India and will be doing it in short term. It's been 4 years and I am still saying the same thing.
How much is 'short term'? few months? couple of years? A deeper thought would reveal that 'short term' is a just 'big excuse' to stick on to US without feeling the guilt of staying away from home land or family. Bitter, but truth.
Now let us call this inertia. What is causing this inertia? Few facts could be -
a. Money - needs no explanation. The more we get, the more we want. The more we make, the more we invest. It's a loop.
b. Comfort - A less tiring life is another popular justification I have heard around. That's true. Most people stay close to work. "Close" is say ~10 miles. A 10 or 15 minutes of drive would let you reach home. Compare it against the hours of travel you need to do from Electronic city to Koramangala! (I have done it tons of times, so I know!).
c. Better place for bringing up Kids - Yup, another truth. (or rather, my wife says so..)
If you agree, add to my list. If you don't, feel free to comment with cons -
I welcome this wholeheartedly. Because I am looking for a reason here.. a reason to break the inertia.
Selective blindness
India - World's most populated democracy - conducted a national election in 18 days. The result came out in 24 hours with a stable alliance elected with minimum majority ..
Still, all CNN could do was a weak display of journalism by giving single post of this news in some corner!
Slumdog millionaire was all over CNN when it won Oscar.
Don't you see the western 'selective blindness' when it comes to India?
If you follow multiple news agencies/magazines, you can notice this very well. No media is impartial. No media is priority-less.
CNN celebrated when Mr.Zardari got "elected" as President of Pakistan. I was like "What?!". Why would anyone care for this guy or his flirting with Sarah Palin. I don't understand who determines what's important enough to come in the top of the list. When it comes to Western media, probably the alliances the home country has with rest of the world plays the role. And eastern media is a lot more influenced by regional politics/religion than national agenda.
End of the day, today's Media has gone 'selective blind' and it sucks!
Still, all CNN could do was a weak display of journalism by giving single post of this news in some corner!
Slumdog millionaire was all over CNN when it won Oscar.
Don't you see the western 'selective blindness' when it comes to India?
If you follow multiple news agencies/magazines, you can notice this very well. No media is impartial. No media is priority-less.
CNN celebrated when Mr.Zardari got "elected" as President of Pakistan. I was like "What?!". Why would anyone care for this guy or his flirting with Sarah Palin. I don't understand who determines what's important enough to come in the top of the list. When it comes to Western media, probably the alliances the home country has with rest of the world plays the role. And eastern media is a lot more influenced by regional politics/religion than national agenda.
End of the day, today's Media has gone 'selective blind' and it sucks!
Sunday, May 3, 2009
Romantic poem by E E Cummings
I carry your heart with me
I carry it in my heart
I am never without it
anywhere I go you go,my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling
I fear no fate for you are my fate, my sweet
here is the deepest secret nobody knows
here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart
I carry your heart
I carry it in my heart
I carry it in my heart
I am never without it
anywhere I go you go,my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling
I fear no fate for you are my fate, my sweet
here is the deepest secret nobody knows
here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart
I carry your heart
I carry it in my heart
Sunday, April 19, 2009
New genre of disgusting malayalam movies...
Malayalee was always proud of the classic movies in 80s and 90s. If you listen to most malayalee conversations you can see the influence of movies in the dialogues they make.
The funny dialogues from Kilukkam still makes way into our conversations. "Thoovanathumbikal" is one of the favorite movies for many. Padmarajan and Bharathan still have a huge fan base. Remember, they are not alive and hence hadn't made any movies in recent times. Our very beloved comic actor Jagathy Sreekumar is undisputably one of the best character actors in India.
So, when did we go wrong? I think the detour from the sensible movies to nonsensical ones started of with MohanLal's superhuman movies. Till that time we were keen to see small budget family movies or comedy based youngsters' movie. I am not blaming Lal alone for the low quality movies. I would say if the mess was lighted up by Lal, Mammotty poured more Oil to it.
Why would I say actors are at fault for crap movies which are clearly a production by director. Because movies in India are creations of directors, but choices of actors.
Unlike hollywood where casting is done post-scripting, in India movies are made for actors. Fundamentally we have a reverse logic where a director gets an actor's date, then finds a producer and then writes a script based on actor's profile plus considering what a producer can afford.
And now where are we? We have seen Mayabazar, Love in Singapore, Hello and all the low quality ones. Now the superstardom is throwing more trash on our face.
But how are these movies surviving in a state with such a high self esteem. It's an age old trick - like making someone drunk and making him dance awkwardly.
Over the past 5 years or more our viewers were gradually poisoned with crap movies and we have to admit that we liked Thommanum Makkalum, Rajamanikyam etc. We enjoyed them because we suddenly saw a serious actor doing slapstick comedy. But we didn't anticipate that there are more to come. The youth in Kerala fell for it. It was like serving alcohol to teenagers. The youngsters grew up the next 5 years or more watching more of mayabazar and the likes.
End result - any crap movie becomes a super hit and we have fan followers as crazy as neighboring states.
New formula to success - 5 songs + 7 fights + 20 punch dialogues + tons of slapstick comedy
Yes, we are no different from rest! Good bye good movies!
The funny dialogues from Kilukkam still makes way into our conversations. "Thoovanathumbikal" is one of the favorite movies for many. Padmarajan and Bharathan still have a huge fan base. Remember, they are not alive and hence hadn't made any movies in recent times. Our very beloved comic actor Jagathy Sreekumar is undisputably one of the best character actors in India.
So, when did we go wrong? I think the detour from the sensible movies to nonsensical ones started of with MohanLal's superhuman movies. Till that time we were keen to see small budget family movies or comedy based youngsters' movie. I am not blaming Lal alone for the low quality movies. I would say if the mess was lighted up by Lal, Mammotty poured more Oil to it.
Why would I say actors are at fault for crap movies which are clearly a production by director. Because movies in India are creations of directors, but choices of actors.
Unlike hollywood where casting is done post-scripting, in India movies are made for actors. Fundamentally we have a reverse logic where a director gets an actor's date, then finds a producer and then writes a script based on actor's profile plus considering what a producer can afford.
And now where are we? We have seen Mayabazar, Love in Singapore, Hello and all the low quality ones. Now the superstardom is throwing more trash on our face.
But how are these movies surviving in a state with such a high self esteem. It's an age old trick - like making someone drunk and making him dance awkwardly.
Over the past 5 years or more our viewers were gradually poisoned with crap movies and we have to admit that we liked Thommanum Makkalum, Rajamanikyam etc. We enjoyed them because we suddenly saw a serious actor doing slapstick comedy. But we didn't anticipate that there are more to come. The youth in Kerala fell for it. It was like serving alcohol to teenagers. The youngsters grew up the next 5 years or more watching more of mayabazar and the likes.
End result - any crap movie becomes a super hit and we have fan followers as crazy as neighboring states.
New formula to success - 5 songs + 7 fights + 20 punch dialogues + tons of slapstick comedy
Yes, we are no different from rest! Good bye good movies!
When I turned 30
[Something I wrote when I turned 30 late last year]
This is a blog I was waiting to write for past few months, but time as always has beaten me.
Anyways here it goes ...
Yes!! I am 30. I guess I am now among the very few people who admit the entry to 30s with excitement.I feel like finally I got rid of something I never liked being.
Life - Now looking back(or down?) through the years I have lived, I think I learned a lot from the mistakes. I repeated most of them multiple times to check if they happen on all circumstances. And yeah!, then do.I don't think life has to be perfect to be wonderful. I have a pretty messed up life and I wouldn't have been what I am today without all those mistakes.
Choices - Choices and options are different. Most people I have known choose out of the options available. But I tend to think differently. Ignore the options and look for what you need. May be your choice is way out of your league, but still worth a chase.
Role play - I am on okay husband, a pretty good dad, a nice brother, cranky son and best buddy of many. Will people miss me if I suddenly disappear one day? Yeah, they will. :)
Effort - I invented procrastination by the way. I use only minimal potential on anything I do. I tend to preserve my energy by sitting idle and acting tired. Recently I have started whining about low blood sugar as the medical reason. My wife believes it. :))
Love and life - Falling in love is easy. Many people fall, bump their head, shake it off and move on. I didn't, because the one I have fallen for was worth dying for.The resistance to win my love was THE toughest thing that I have ever faced in my entire life. If I have to write a book about our love story, I need to publish in at least two volumes. Now when I think about it, Randy Pausch was absolutely right. Brick walls are there for a reason. They are there to show how badly you need someone.
Money - A sophisticated tool that humans invented to make transactions easier. That's exactly money is for me too. I am not going live or die for money.
Ideology - When I was at school I used to admire SFI activists. Oh, what a fun it is to beat others for selfish interests. Establishing anarchy would really relax lifes!!! brake.. sorry, that was the dark side of me.I am more inclined to socialism and have acute disrespect for the typical Indian nature of "I don't bother what's happening next door".I believe in GOD, but not in religion. My daughter's last name is Nair, only because that went well with her first name. And I don't gauge people by caste or colour. (But I still ask my mom why am I darker than her).
Finally - I am really happy to be here today with you all.
This is a blog I was waiting to write for past few months, but time as always has beaten me.
Anyways here it goes ...
Yes!! I am 30. I guess I am now among the very few people who admit the entry to 30s with excitement.I feel like finally I got rid of something I never liked being.
Life - Now looking back(or down?) through the years I have lived, I think I learned a lot from the mistakes. I repeated most of them multiple times to check if they happen on all circumstances. And yeah!, then do.I don't think life has to be perfect to be wonderful. I have a pretty messed up life and I wouldn't have been what I am today without all those mistakes.
Choices - Choices and options are different. Most people I have known choose out of the options available. But I tend to think differently. Ignore the options and look for what you need. May be your choice is way out of your league, but still worth a chase.
Role play - I am on okay husband, a pretty good dad, a nice brother, cranky son and best buddy of many. Will people miss me if I suddenly disappear one day? Yeah, they will. :)
Effort - I invented procrastination by the way. I use only minimal potential on anything I do. I tend to preserve my energy by sitting idle and acting tired. Recently I have started whining about low blood sugar as the medical reason. My wife believes it. :))
Love and life - Falling in love is easy. Many people fall, bump their head, shake it off and move on. I didn't, because the one I have fallen for was worth dying for.The resistance to win my love was THE toughest thing that I have ever faced in my entire life. If I have to write a book about our love story, I need to publish in at least two volumes. Now when I think about it, Randy Pausch was absolutely right. Brick walls are there for a reason. They are there to show how badly you need someone.
Money - A sophisticated tool that humans invented to make transactions easier. That's exactly money is for me too. I am not going live or die for money.
Ideology - When I was at school I used to admire SFI activists. Oh, what a fun it is to beat others for selfish interests. Establishing anarchy would really relax lifes!!! brake.. sorry, that was the dark side of me.I am more inclined to socialism and have acute disrespect for the typical Indian nature of "I don't bother what's happening next door".I believe in GOD, but not in religion. My daughter's last name is Nair, only because that went well with her first name. And I don't gauge people by caste or colour. (But I still ask my mom why am I darker than her).
Finally - I am really happy to be here today with you all.
A country that lost its identity
"WE, THE PEOPLE OF INDIA, having solemnly resolved to constitute India into a SOVEREIGN SOCIALIST SECULAR DEMOCRATIC REPUBLIC and to secure to all its citizens: JUSTICE, social, economic and political;LIBERTY of thought, expression, belief, faith and worship;EQUALITY of status and of opportunity;and to promote among them allFRATERNITY assuring the dignity of the individual and the unity and integrity of the Nation;IN OUR CONSTITUENT ASSEMBLY this twenty-sixth day of November, 1949, do HEREBYADOPT, ENACT AND GIVE TO OURSELVES THIS CONSTITUTION."
This is the preamble to the consititution of INDIA. Where are we 50 years from the day this was written?
Let us start with SOVEREIGN - a country that holds the supreme authority to law making and enforcing it. Even the Supreme court judging panel won't bet on this. Our polcies are always influenced by the regional and national politics. That's the reason our nation doesn't or will never have the guts to give capital punishment to any terrorist who is proven guilty. So are we SOVEREIGN? No. We are more of SEMI-SOVEREIGN.
Now SOCIALIST - An economic system that through state or public ownership of any production ensures economic equality to citizens. What? Our economy and politics are controlled by Ambanis and the likes. We are part of the globalization and probably we are as SOCIALIST as United States.
SECULAR - This is the best part. India has no Unified Civil Code. What applies to me may not apply to David or Rahim.
DEMOCRATIC - Former terrorists and hooligans get elected from most states in India. They get into administration and we are good till "by the people, of the people", but does any elected representative work "for the people"? No.
to secure to all its citizens - 13 terrorist strikes in 2008. Yet the administration won't or can't act.
Equality of status and of opportunity - I am all for reservation. I am a strong believer that hundreds of years of anarchy and suppression has created mutiple classes of people. The ones that were subject to ages of brutality needs to be raised to the same level of others - through decades of education and opportunities. But is caste the single criteria for it? It might apply fairly well in Bihar, but not in more forward states like Kerala or Tamil Nadu. It is just common sense that you need to realize that the reservation scheme in 21st century needs to be redrafted and should be subject to review every few years. Otherwise, we are just reversing the hour glass.
What this makes us? A country that lost its identity..
This is the preamble to the consititution of INDIA. Where are we 50 years from the day this was written?
Let us start with SOVEREIGN - a country that holds the supreme authority to law making and enforcing it. Even the Supreme court judging panel won't bet on this. Our polcies are always influenced by the regional and national politics. That's the reason our nation doesn't or will never have the guts to give capital punishment to any terrorist who is proven guilty. So are we SOVEREIGN? No. We are more of SEMI-SOVEREIGN.
Now SOCIALIST - An economic system that through state or public ownership of any production ensures economic equality to citizens. What? Our economy and politics are controlled by Ambanis and the likes. We are part of the globalization and probably we are as SOCIALIST as United States.
SECULAR - This is the best part. India has no Unified Civil Code. What applies to me may not apply to David or Rahim.
DEMOCRATIC - Former terrorists and hooligans get elected from most states in India. They get into administration and we are good till "by the people, of the people", but does any elected representative work "for the people"? No.
to secure to all its citizens - 13 terrorist strikes in 2008. Yet the administration won't or can't act.
Equality of status and of opportunity - I am all for reservation. I am a strong believer that hundreds of years of anarchy and suppression has created mutiple classes of people. The ones that were subject to ages of brutality needs to be raised to the same level of others - through decades of education and opportunities. But is caste the single criteria for it? It might apply fairly well in Bihar, but not in more forward states like Kerala or Tamil Nadu. It is just common sense that you need to realize that the reservation scheme in 21st century needs to be redrafted and should be subject to review every few years. Otherwise, we are just reversing the hour glass.
What this makes us? A country that lost its identity..
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